Confined

“I love you”.
Zara hopelessly smiled and looked down while her fingers played with the blanket.
“Okay. Talk to you later. Bye”.
And hung up. The call log showed the time of 34:22.
She switched off the lights and laid down on her right. His last words hauntingly whispered in her head for the next fifteen minutes. Out of distress, she turned on her back with her arms crossed behind her head. Stairing at the ceiling, she tried to remain strong and not cry.

Zara very well knew how to lead a happy life. No matter how hard times were, she always made her way out of them. She could excite the atmosphere with her innocent, silly talks and optimistic laugh everyone yearned for. Except for this time. This time she felt defeated. She was lost somewhere between her believe and her reality.

“Isn’t love suppose to set you free?”, She quesioned herself. “How can he love me and demand a change? When he told me that he loved me, I thought he loved ME. My imperfections, careless talks, silly jokes, all these parts of me. They define me as much as my skills, thoughts, likes and dislikes do. He loves me, and then erases the fine details of me. I don’t believe in this love.”

A tear stood in the corner of her eye. “I can’t pretend to like things I don’t like. I can’t pretend to not enjoy every moment of my life. I can’t pretend to show intrest in business talks. I can’t pretend to love his love for materialism. I cant pretend to ignore the pain I feel when I see a struggling human. I can’t pretend. I don’t want to pretend.”

“Two years earlier, while proposing, he promised me to do the best he can to make me happy. I’m not happy. This is not the best. He knows that. He implies his needs upon me. I don’t want to give him what he needs. I want to give him what I have. I want to love him the way love should be. Raw! Why can’t he love me the way I am, or not love me at all? How can I give him someone else in my my skin? I accept him, why can’t he accept me? What kind of selfish love is this?”

Her mind silenced. She couldn’t answer her own quesions. No one could. She digged deep and deeper, but nothing, except silence. Silence was probably the only answer to this. Not quesioning was the only solution. Her thoughts knocked her to sleep, this was the only escape.

________________________________________
Everything about you defines “YOU”. Let it not change for anyone.
________________________________________
Loving someone is not to appriciate their beauty and intellect. It is to respect every aspect of them. Even if we don’t understand.

This is my first attempt of story writting. Critics are always welcome 🙂

The Oceans

I prefer ocean over earth.
Who talk to me without saying a word.
Who shine on the surface But have shades of grey under their skins.
Who hide treasures
And turn tears into pearls.
Unpredictable and bold,
Flexible and sensitive.
Who are not afraid to take in filth of the world with their tides;
Who have been surfed over.
Who have secrets buried below the ground,
Yet reflect sun in their smiles.
Who don’t belong to anybody,
And nobody belongs to them.
I crave such people.
People who, despite of having their unsettled waves,
Have peace and harmony inside them.

Good Night Darling

I haven’t written any blog recently. Reason? I was trying to standardize my sleeping habits (I write at night). Which, of course, did not last for more than two days. So I went online and tried to search remedies and reasons to why can’t people sleep at normal time. The search results horrified me. They were all about how bad sleeping habits effect our health and immunity etc. I was just scared but not helped. So, to minimize my tension, I helped myself and penned down the reason to my delayed sleep. 1. Thinking Well, pretty obvious. This had to be the first reason. Just as I lay down, a storm of thoughts hits my mind. I think about about all the things I have to do tomorrow because I didn’t do them today or yesterday or the whole year. And on unfortunate events, when I have to wake up early next morning, I’ll spend 2 hours thinking about how do I stop thinking and go to sleep! 670px-Go-to-Sleep-when-You-Can't-Stop-Thinking-of-Things-You-Regret-Step-42. Blanket/Temperature If feet are covered in the blanket, it’s hot and if uncovered, it’s freezing. WHAT? THERE IS NO LEVEL OF SATISFACTION! But since I’m smart, I let my feet out for sometime than tuck them in. Brainy, right! 39c9b97686970d4efda644ad549bdc28 3. The Position We know how to sleep since we were born. Than why is it still so hard to decide the position we are most comfortable in? Do we just forget everyday what position did we last sleep in? Seriously? sleep-positions 4. Craving for Food Once I have finally stop thinking and set my position, I’m starving. And for the next hour I complaint on twitter, facebook or whatsap about how hungry I am and think about pizzas and pancakes. (Trust me, I’m on this stage right now. I’m starving. But of course, Lazy people never get out of the bed). giphy Which leads to.. .. buzz buzz. 5. Mobile Phone I put my mobile phone on silent to avoid using it, but the struggle…is hard. I start by think “just one article” and end up using it for next 2-4 hours and than finally sleep with my face on the screen. *Sigh*. funny-time-bed-comic-laptop-phone-pics-e1396303224941 Anyways, that’s all that keeps me from sleeping. But on a serious note, bad sleeping habits lead to very serious health problems. This issue needs to be addressed more often.

Lust for Geniune.

image

People often confuse our admiration for purity with lust of perfection.
We all crave love that cannot be translated, a friendship that see no benefits, Relationships that do not deceive, Hearts that only know the truth. Absolute smiles; Pure and gentle. Of that which come right from the heart, into the eyes leaving a mark on the lips.

THE JOURNEY

Starting from the day we were created, evident changes have occurred in us. We evaluated from a clot of blood to whole human body within nine months. A 51 Cm body transforms to 5 feet body in the blink of an eye. The way we think, words we speak, theory of life, everything is a result of continuous fluctuations existing in our lives.

Sometimes I think about how strangely delicate and beautiful human nature is. How a simple observation or an incident can alter the whole perception of oneself. A small dance in the rain or a long drive in summer days, the glory of the day or silence of the night, a lover’s look in the eye or betrayal of a friend…everything…everything makes a difference.

We live among a cluster of people, even if we don’t talk to all of them, there is still something in common, something that keeps us connected. After realizing the connection, I also realized that it’s not just our personal situations that effect us, It’s others as-well. our fragile heart can so easily be refashioned, only by a trauma our eyes witness or a sensational conversation we hear. All of it leaves a mark deep down in our hearts or goes back into subconscious, but always remains there, always.

The combination of all the observations and neglects, inspirations and depressions, experiences and ignorance, makes our next step, next step we take towards our destination. our destination…? It’s today, It’s this moment we are living. We have come across a long way, each leaving behind a unique history, a unique story that might not be heard by many or never be written in books, but has been experienced once. These unending variations will continue to help us in continuing our JOURNEY…a journey to the person we are to today.

I dedicate this blog to everyone who feels life is rough. Let the poetry of everything touch you. Let it leave a mark on you. Let it enhance the beauty in you.

This is my first blog ever. Feel free to comment below your feedback and reviews.

I hope you all like it..